It seems like it has been forever since I wrote out a post about my life and everything that goes on. I find it freeing to be able to express my feelings and talk about what's important to me. The last couple months have been trying on my feelings emotional, mentally, and physically but there have been some amazing moments and memories made along the way.Colton started School, he turned 5, we visited the zoo, I had pregnancy scares and issues but still treading along, I lost friendships and gain a few good ones, but the most heartbreaking is almost buying what I considered my dream house and being a week from closing when the seller backs out from impatience when I worked my butt off for two months to do this practically alone, stressing myself out, and having headaches that made me literally sick. I didn't have anyone to talk to about my feelings since friendships I thought I had disappeared and people could care less. Through that experience I also realized I can't plan my future, I can't get my hopes up, I can't count on others, I can only count on myself, Let go of trying to plan my life and let life happen as it comes. 2011 as by far been the hardest year for me. I think I expected more out of it and life and more out of people and gave it all too much credit. Expecting things doesn't always turn out in your favor. Sometimes the most trusting can slap you in the face and bring you to your knees but I always know that I am strong, I can let go, and I can be myself 100% with or without these things and people. If anything hurts you, let it go, be happy, and live for what makes you happy, always.
Now let's skip to Colton. He started School the beginning of August. He was/still is so excited to learn, ride the bus, and always talks about his friends. We are trying to work on him paying attention more and not rushing through work but when he applies himself he is one smart little boy. He knows so much and absorbs everything he comes in contact with. I know he will be a wonderful person with his kind, gentle side. He will be a friendly, compassionate friend. He will work hard on things he loves and is passionate about. I never expect perfect from my children I always want them to be happy and to work hard to get what they want and he seems to be doing it even if sometimes we have to work on a little harder than others. At first he didn't talk much about school or people but now he always comes home and talks about his friend and what he's done during the day and it warms my heart that he has made friends and not being as shy and timid around others. Here are a few photos from his first day of school!
Colton's birthday was August 28th which he turned 5!!! We decided to do something simple this year and take the kids and some family to the zoo followed by pizza and games afterwards. He had an amazing time and loved it more than any birthday party I could of prepared. He loved all the animals and it was just a day for him and we tried to make it amazing and memorable.
Just a few I have more on my flickr if you want to check them out!
We had some more family time in August/September during holidays and going a company picnic at holiday world!
And holiday world...
Now on to my pregnancy! I'm now 16 (almost 17) weeks! I found out a week ago we are expecting a little boy! I'm more then thrilled. Ryan picked out the name Mason and I loved the name Liam so his name will be Mason Liam Franklin. I've had pregnancy issues since 8 weeks starting with a sub chronic hemorrhage. Which has been doing well the last few weeks and thankfully hasn't hurt the baby since it can cause miscarriages a lot which made me scared for a couple of months and stressed to the max! Then my cervix started to shorten. The Normal length is 4cm and mine was 2cm so they put in a cerclage and so far so good with that. Mason started moving and I felt it around 13.5 weeks and I felt him kick on the outside at 15 weeks. Ryan felt him last night and I can already see him move. I think he will be a strong, big guy. I'm hoping for another vbac and trying for no epidural so I can hopefully skip the risk of forceps and a csection if all possible! I already look 6 months pregnant and starting showing around 2 months which huge since I didn't with Colton until 6 months and 4 months with Adelyn! I'm excited to start on the boys room. I'm doing a vintage airplane theme with matching furniture. I also want to redo addys room a bit by adding a huge tree decal with vintage births. I'm ready to plan and buy for this little guy and hoping he doesn't try to come on February 29th since it's a leap year and he's due March 3rd 2012. Here are some belly shots and ultrasound photos since I get them every 1-2 weeks to check on cervix and internal bled.
Baby around 11 weeks!
It's a BOY!
He was shy ;-)!
So about the house situation. We have decided since that fell threw and after crying for 2 hours I realized this may be a blessing and what we actually needed. I may not got what i wanted now but I know we can work for even better in the future and concentrate on bigger things at the moment. God makes everything happen for a reason and apparently it wasn't time for the big move for us, once I realized this I went from depressed to feeling like a weight from lifting from me and felt motivated and excited about life in the present and working on the future and realizing whatever comes will come. We decided we will do what we were going to in the first place and that is redo a lot of things in the house now from windows, carpet, deck, roof, and small things here and there and then sell it when the time comes next year and we can make a bigger profit and buy something more than we were going to before and the wait may indeed be worth it. I already and blessed with what I have now and a lot to focus on and materialistic things won't overrun me anymore. So positive thinking and happy thoughts from now on!